Word Definition Puns
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Loading ...These words and/or their definitions are made up and humorous.
- Chessnut - one who is crazy about playing chess
- Carpet - A pet you keep in your car
- Infantry - A baby tree
- (Add a letter) Diepole - a pole you tie the prisoner to when he is shot.
- Safety - Tea that's OK to drink
- Kilowatt - To murder ole Mr. Watt
- Nullifly - 1. To put someone on a no fly list 2. To kill a fly
- Detailed - a dog that's had its tail removed
- (change one letter) Defeeted - Having had one feet amputated or cut off accidentally
- Storage - The number of years it has been since the store was first built.
- Woofer - In German it is a synonym for "ein Barkenpantensnifferfer"
- Curtail - the tail of a mongrel (I suppose it could also be to shorten the tail of a mongrel.)
- Recur - A mongrel that reincarnates as a mongrel
- Friday - The day you fry something
- Hostage - The age of your host
- Napkin - a relative you take a siesta with
- Ratify - To increase the rat population
- Season - one's son who is born at sea
- Seasoning - Giving birth to a son at sea
- (Add a letter) Electrick - vote for Rick and put him in office
- (Change one letter) Incarmate - to have sex in an automobile
- Steward - the man who prepares the stew
- (Remove a letter) Cabage - how old a taxi is
- Flippant - an ant that performs somersaults
- Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period of time.
- Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an asshole.
- Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with.
- Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.
- Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.
- Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.
- Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.
- Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.
- Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.
- Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit.)
- Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's, like, a serious bummer.
- Decafalon (n.): The gruelling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you.
- Glibido: All talk and no action.
- Dopeler Effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.
- Arachnoleptic Fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked through a spider web.
- Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito, that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.
- Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half a worm in the fruit you're eating.
- coffee, n. the person upon whom one coughs.
- flabbergasted, adj. appalled by discovering how much weight one has gained.
- abdicate, v. to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.
- esplanade, v. to attempt an explanation while drunk.
- willy-nilly, adj. impotent.
- negligent, adj. absentmindedly answering the door when wearing only a nightgown.
- lymph, v. to walk with a lisp.
- gargoyle, n. olive-flavored mouthwash.
- flatulence, n. emergency vehicle that picks up someone who has been run over by a steamroller.
- balderdash, n. a rapidly receding hairline..
- testicle, n. a humorous question on an exam.
- rectitude, n. the formal, dignified bearing adopted by proctologists.
- pokemon, n.. a Rastafarian proctologist.
- oyster, n. a person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddishisms.
- Frisbeetarianism, n. the belief that, after death, the soul flies up onto the roof and gets stuck there.
- circumvent, n. an opening in the front of boxer shorts worn by Jewish men.